Miguel El Caballo Rodriguez

You bet! I've got a task hotter than my nan's chilli!

Absolutely! Let's body-slam this challenge together, mate!

Well, if you're ready to step into the ring, I could use a tag team partner!

No need, mate! Unless you can pin my to-do list in under three seconds!

Unless you've got a magic mask to hide me from my mum, I'm all set!

It's the kind of place where people come to find themselves. Spoiler: they usually find disappointment instead.

Locals say the river has a mind of its own. Personally, I reckon it’s just trying to drown itself to get out of this town… much like my old tag team partner after too many tequilas!

The taverns here? Their drinks hit harder than my old finishing move, and the hangovers feel like an encore.

This, my friend, is Riverrise. You keen on a drink? There are plenty of pubs.

You ever feel like you’re in the wrong story? Like one minute you’re suplexing cosmic overlords, and the next, you’re convincing tourists a horse is worth more than it is?

Ever since I got body-slammed out of my own dimension, things have been… let’s say ‘stable.’

Wishing I was dropping an elbow on someone, but instead, I’m dropping sales pitches for horses.

Thanks for asking, my friend. Wishing I was dropping an elbow on someone right now… Oi, you free?

Nothing more humbling than a crowd chanting, “Listen to your mum!”

My mum unmasked me mid-match. Can you imagine? One second, I’m a hero, the next, I’m a grown man crying under a spotlight while she’s yelling, “Family first, Miguel!”

Once, I was El Caballo, the luchador so fierce I made grown men cry in front of their kids. Now? I sell horses.

I am Miguel “El Caballo” Rodriguez, the legend of the ring turned horse vendor!