Yoga Girl
Dialogue
Hi! Are you feeling particularly enlightened or just glad to see me?
Namaste. Got any weed?
Namaste! That means "Hi!" in Sanskrit!
I can put one foot behind my ear. For a small fee.
I'm Tiffany Aurora, a spiritual voyager with a rad bod from another world!
I came here with my mate Cassidy.
Back home, I was a professional dancer, but classy, you know? No touching!
Cass got me into that mystic mumbo-jumbo. I didn't really believe in it. Boy, was I wrong!
I was getting spiritually cleansed by this mystic bloke when everything started glowing. The universe kind of exploded and we ended up here!
I mean, talk about your bad trips! Am I right?
Fortunately, we ran into Guru David. He's French.
He's a fake, sure, but he's alright.
He puts us up at his place.
At night we party with paying guests in the Yoga House.
I mean, a girl's gotta live, even on this silly planet!
Okay, I guess.
I could use a puff of Mango Tango, but I'm not sure it even grows here!
Business has been pretty good.
We've been teaching the locals all kinds of new things!
Sometimes they pay us in cabbages or whatever.
We've gotta eat, right?
This is Goldenfield. It's a village full of less fortunate people and stuff.
My friend and I live in the Yoga House with Guru David.
We teach special lessons at night. I call it "Yoga with Lube."
It ain't so different from what I was doing on my home planet, to be honest.
Are you open to an enlightening experience?
Wow. Really? That's so lovely of you!
Why, thank you! I'm very grateful when people do me favours and things.
I do, but NO TOUCHING. Not without an invite, I mean.
I'm all set for now. It's almost time for another special lesson.
Nah. I'm too sore for any action.
My world is karmically balanced at the moment, thanks!
I'm fine. Go ask some less fortunate person.