Farmer Watermelon

Suit yourself, but don't come crying when there's no handouts.

Everyone'll tell ya this is a shithole, but it was nice before that portal opened.

Begging for a job already?

You know what I say to that? To hell with the portals!

I'll ask a local if something comes up.

These pipes of mine, I tell ya, more temperamental than a wet hen.

Every other day, they're springing leaks. Beginning to think portal jumpers are opening 'em.

I was born here in Kwalat, and I earned what I got here. No handouts!

Fuck off. Never know when a pipe might spring a leak.

I'm just great. Would be even better if my farmin' system fuckin worked.

Kicheki! Been workin myself to the bone since I was a youngin.

So you're gonna just leave me in this shitty situation, shocker.

The the gub'erment said I had to start growin' these darn watermelons.

Help? From the likes of you?

Yer in Goldenfield Village, my home. MY home, got it?

You bet your boots I could use some help.

So here I am, knee-deep in mud and pipe grease. Just another day in paradise, huh?

Got them parts from Junkyard. Never should've trusted those dirty portal-jumpin' hobos.

No need for help, unless you can make these pipes stop leakin'.

Alright then, guess I'll handle it myself. Just like always.

Don't dawdle! I'll be here, fixin' this fuckin barometer!

All yer kind are the same. Now get off of my property!

I get that you have no fuckin soul, you outworlder jerk.

We shouldn't be giving those folks free food and bread. Disgusting!

Guess I'll make you useful for somethin'.

And who has to fix 'em? Yours truly. Why don't you take some responsibility?

Find and replace leakin' pipes with new ones. You can usually find 'em in barrels or crates.

Now I'm plum busy fixin' pipes and yellin' at leaks. It's a bitch, lemme tell ya.